We, humans assume we know ourselves well, but we constantly continue to discover ourselves and still strive to learn more. Oh, it is such an exciting feeling to discover one’s self…
I am very hopeful for the future. It was very beautiful until today, and will only get better.
The ‘Discovery’ series was painted for my first ever exhibition. People, who are very valuable and dear to me, fully supported me during this period. ‘The big heart’, who encouraged me to be a part of this exhibition will forever be in my memories. This person had advised me to paint paintings, which were “within me”. I was searching to find answers to “who am I and what stage of my life am I at?” questions. I had one and a half months to complete my paintings. The first month I only thought and imagined about my paintings. The remaining time was all about putting my thoughts and dreams onto the canvas.
Who am I?
The first painting is “The Woman”. This painting was the survival of my child spirit, while a woman was being born from the ashes. They would always say that “a woman becomes, who she is once she turns thirty”. I see today that they are very right. As of 2015, my life started to take a turn. That little girl, still remaining the little girl she is, was evolving into a woman. She was going to take control of her life and become “I”. This painting is the representation of “the woman” in me. It depicts womanhood, companionship, nurture, protectionism, strength, wisdom, beauty, love, sensitivity, home and giving life.
What stage of my life am I at?
The second painting completed was “The Awakening”. It started falling off from my brush onto the canvas and became ‘forever’ like an ebullient waterfall. It was how the woman had ‘awakened’. It was waking up from all of the shuteyes. The stars were the representation of the woman’s beliefs and awakening. Just like the ‘star’ shaped birthmark on her leg, these stars were the ornaments of her painting.
The painting named “6 Hours” was narrating the beginning of the chain of miracles. It was expressing how the miracles lay within us and with a little shift of perspective we are capable of many things. The brain and the heart are such a powerful organs that once we join them together they are capable of miracles. We shall never forget this.
“6 Hours” was the first painting in the exhibition to find its new owner. As I mentioned, it was the beginning of the chain of miracles.
The fourth painting is a painting, which always makes me smile. It’s called “Happiness”. This painting was in my head all along, and as a result, it came out very naturally. “Happiness” was running from my brush to find life on my canvas. It was completed, while I was with a friend, whom I value very much. I was most curious to find who would become the new owner of this painting, and now I know.
The final painting ‘Balance’ was painted in the memory of the message, which I internalized during this ‘discovery’ period. It is critical to find our balance in life. I always thought of myself as a ‘black and white’, clear person, however life is full of grey areas. As much as grey is not a very much-enjoyed colour, finding balance in life can only be achieved by managing the grey areas of it. Now I am working on this.
Hoping for all of us to find our balance.
Ayşe Gülşin Doğan